How to move forward???

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Please can any of you help before I give up playing entirely!

I am stuck at my current, rubbish, level and cannot seem to progress from there and it's really getting me down.  I don't want to give up, I have lovely gear and want to improve but I am stuck at just playing open chords and basic strumming.  It's ridiculous. I struggle greatly with barre chords as I have spoken about before.  I am trying to learn scales and where to find all the notes on the fretboard but it just doesn't seem to be going in! I am beginning to wonder if it's either an age or sex thing (I am a 51 year old woman) or if I am just not cut out for this as much as I love it.  

I have been been having some lessons but they are probably either going to come to an end or become much less frequent due to me having had to resign from my job due to health reasons. Therefore whatever I do is going to have to be something I can do myself. 

I had had the chance to play in a jam session last Saturday but ended up just sitting watching and listening to everyone having fun and doing what I wanted to be doing but couldn't because I was not clever enough.  It spoilt what was an otherwise great evening for me.

With my dad having recently passed away I could really do with something good to enjoy and distract myself a bit.  I would love to do some open mic nights but right now I would probably just make an arse of myself and get laughed out of the pub.  So, please please does anyone have any suggestions for anything I can do to improve my playing before I either have a big gear bonfire at the bottom of my garden or advertise the lot for sale. 


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Comments

  • Flink_PoydFlink_Poyd Frets: 2490
    Everyone hits a plateau every now and again which makes it seem like then end of the world. 

     Have you looked at Justin Guitar on YouTube? There's loads of info from beginners to intermediate that can give you ideas or songs to try. 
     Open mic was a missed opportunity, everyone makes mistakes and feels daft you just plough on and laugh it off. 
    Nobody is guaranteed tomorrow.....


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  • punchesjudypunchesjudy Frets: 1020
    Firstly, dont sell off everything. You will regret it in the long term. 

    Ive been playing guitar now for years, 16 maybe? I dont even know. But a few years back i hit a plateau real hard and just gave up. I sold off nearly everything and didnt touch what i had left for about 3 years. Suddenly one day i just felt like playing again. Since then, ive been buying so much stuff just to get back to what i had, ive spent a fortune. A fortune i could have avoided if i didnt just sell everything off. I have been playing more lately than i ever have though and im definitely improving. 

    Im not even technically that good at guitar. I may have been playing a long time and i can work my way around a fretboard, but i honestly dont even know what half the chords I play are. It may sound stupid, but just relax and enjoy it. Barre chords will become easier with time. Scales will eventually stick in your head. You will learn through trial and error. Just noodling around at night in front of the tv can lead to unexpected things. You may learn a few new chords. Work out a new song. Hell, just become slowly more proficient. 

    I guess what im saying is, dont give up, dont sweat the small stuff, just practice and you will improve. You may not notice it, but trust me, stuff will click at some point. 


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  • TheBlueWolfTheBlueWolf Frets: 1536
    Here's Justin's site https://www.justinguitar.com/

    He has a very relaxed and informal approach to teaching guitar. Some of his resources are paid for but there's plenty of free stuff too. He does a beginner course which would suit you pretty well :)

    We all hit a plateau in our playing. It's been my experience that I can't see the wood for the trees at times and I forget that I play guitar for fun.

    Twisted Imaginings - A Horror And Gore Themed Blog http://bit.ly/2DF1NYi


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  • GrunfeldGrunfeld Frets: 4028
    Super quick thoughts:
    There’s a ton of really important stuff going on in your life which is likely to affect your sense of who you are and what you can and can’t do, both with stuff that’s gone before and hopes for playing this bloody instrument.
    There are health issues which I’m sure are concerning enough in themselves and you’re already thinking about the impact loss of earnings might have on being able to afford guitar lessons.  Not a problem.  Most of us are self-taught.

    There’s the loss of your dad (RIP) which suddenly means your place in the world has changed.  

    And you met your critical voice which, not content with keeping you offstage last Saturday night, is now having a blast telling you that you’re too old and that you’re female, duh, and that everyone else had fun but you weren’t good enough to have fun!)  And that’s the great thing about critical voices:  they state the bleedin’ obvious, “You can’t play enough….”  And they’ll come up with sh*t to keep you stuck in a rut. 

    You’re not too old to have fun.
    You’re not too female to have fun.
    You’re not too crap a guitar player to have fun [ask me how I know ;) ]

    Your battle is with your critical voice, not with your guitar.

    Last thought:  you were around at the arse end of when punk came along.  Punk, whether you liked it or not, says that you can play your guitar no matter what and don’t give a fuck about it.  It’s your inheritance.
    Go spend it; don’t give a shit; have fun!


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  • VimFuegoVimFuego Frets: 15476
    edited April 2017

    as has already been said, everyone hits plateaus, and these can become self reinforcing, especially if there is no outside source of encouragement. And, as many of us are bedroom/spareroom noodlers, this applies to a lot of us. For me, finding a place to play outside of the house and with other people, who were/are accepting of my lack of abilty, was the key. Sometimes it may be finding something different, if you always play electric, try something on acoustic, or learn some fingerstyle. Try a different style of music, IMO it's not always best to try to brute force through a problem, try to work around it.


    EDIT: with regard to barre chords, everyone struggles with these at 1st. Something practical you can try is put the lightest gauge strings you can find on. It may make your guitar lack some tone, but it'll help you physically. Nothing breed success like success.

    I'm not locked in here with you, you are locked in here with me.

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  • StavrosStavros Frets: 328
    You are obviously going through a bad period in your life and I feel for you. My mum is very poorly at the moment and it's not looking good, but one of the things that keeps me going is trying to improve my playing; I only started this year and I too am stuck on Barre chords, especially the F chord which I can play ok but cannot move to and from quickly enough yet to be able to use it in chord sequences.

    The suggestions to look at JustinGuitar.com are good ones, and even my poor chord changes ARE slowly improving following his One Minute Changes lessons.

    Please keep going, I agree that you will surely regret it one day.
    I love my brick
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  • vizviz Frets: 10647
    Yep. Don't be hard on yourself, just keep playing, you will find that some bits get better of themselves, and others just take a long time but with practice you will move forward without really noticing. As others have said, Justin is really marvellous. 
    Roland said: Scales are primarily a tool for categorising knowledge, not a rule for what can or cannot be played.
    Supportact said: [my style is] probably more an accumulation of limitations and bad habits than a 'style'.
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  • TheBlueWolfTheBlueWolf Frets: 1536
    I'd like to offer my condolences on the loss of your dad too. That plus your health and job worries probably mean you're quite distracted, with good reason, right now.

    It's got nothing at all to do with your age or gender though. Anyone can learn to play guitar. The forum demographic suggests it's largely a male pursuit but there's a plethora of great female guitarist out there :)

    Twisted Imaginings - A Horror And Gore Themed Blog http://bit.ly/2DF1NYi


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  • mike_lmike_l Frets: 5700
    As someone with health issues (I have Crohn's), and not a great guitarist, take it from me you will enjoy playing at a jam night. You will be getting better, even though you don't notice.

    Find something you want to learn, that is slightly above your current playing level, and learn it. Find a book+CD package so you can learn the parts and play along to the CD.

    You'll find the players at jam nights are really supportive of others, as they have all been in the beginner and learning stage.

    Ringleader of the Cambridge cartel, pedal champ and king of the dirt boxes (down to 21) 

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  • CarpeDiemCarpeDiem Frets: 275
    I would urge you not to give up, but remember what made you want to play in the first place. The other responders have all given good advice. Keep going to the Open Mic nights, partly to meet other players, and see that people don't get boo'd off - they are all there to have fun and are generally supportive. Try and find someone local to jam with and exchange ideas - your guitar teacher may know someone. Also, your age and gender should make no difference to your ability to learn and improve; there are some awesome female players.
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