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What has Drew been up to?

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WiresDreamDisastersWiresDreamDisasters Frets: 16664
edited December 2018 in Off Topic
Inspired by @manicguitarist and his thread. Thought I'd roughly summarise the last year or so since I bailed from tFB in 2017.

- Fatherhood has been a difficult thing to grasp. I have good days and I have bad days.
- I've had a job title change. I'm no longer anything to do with QA or tech support. I'm now officially an employed sound engineer and product owner.
- My band released a new single. You can check that out at www.bridgedisaster.co.uk
- I've been working on my vocals more and more, and no longer outright hate my voice.
- I applied for NHS Talking Therapies back in January and it's taken until now to get anything concrete happening.
- I had my introduction to CBT this week.
- I've restarted my driving lessons after my first instructor was just a total idiot, and kind of abusive. Screaming and shouting at me when I made slight mistakes - so I dropped him and didn't do any lessons for a year.
- I'm spending more time in studios doing stuff like this for work (25 microphones on a piano, yes please!):


- I'm now 34, and I am looking at my 20's with a lot of regret and rumination. I think my meltdown last year and my derisory conduct was largely down to dissatisfaction in life, which I was unconsciously (okay, sometimes consciously) taking out on you fine folks. Coz I'm an idiot.

So yeah, no major wounds or hardships to speak of. Just the setting in of general mid-life crisis type stuff that I'm only just getting to grips with. And it's nearly midnight, and I'm posting about it on a forum. That's not exactly healthy either.

Next year, new exercise regime. Cut out the booze much more than I already am doing. Find some non-musical stuff to get into so I don't have all my mental eggs in one basket.

Bye!

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Comments

  • We've all been there, or if we haven't we will be at one point. You're not alone.

    As a silly aside, I asked my Mrs to get me a CBT course for my 30th, but instead of realising I was asking for moped lessons she said "Can't you get that on the NHS?". Thankfully she didn't think I meant the other CBT...


    Please note my communication is not very good, so please be patient with me
    soundcloud.com/thecolourbox-1
    youtube.com/@TheColourboxMusic
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  • We've all been there, or if we haven't we will be at one point. You're not alone.

    As a silly aside, I asked my Mrs to get me a CBT course for my 30th, but instead of realising I was asking for moped lessons she said "Can't you get that on the NHS?". Thankfully she didn't think I meant the other CBT...


    hahaha! I'll do that one of these days too! I still have my mum's whinging voice in my head telling me not to ride a motorbike.

    Bye!

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  • monquixotemonquixote Frets: 17485
    tFB Trader
    Well done on the promotion Drew.

    You are a talented dude and it's great they are putting your skills to better use.
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  • Well done on the promotion Drew.

    You are a talented dude and it's great they are putting your skills to better use.
    Not so much of a promotion really as recognition of "ohh... you've been doing that for a decade? OK then, have a job title." 

    lol. The music industry is really dysfunctional.

    I hope you're doing well Nick.

    Bye!

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  • I guess you’ve been sending me ideas with vocals on for a couple of years now. It’s been pretty clear to me that you’ve improved loads 
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  • Be better not to turn away from the Mic when talking. 
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  • RMJRMJ Frets: 1274
    I can empathise entirely with your first point. 
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  • HattigolHattigol Frets: 8176
    I didn't know you the first time round but I'd certainly praise the frankness, honesty and recognition of previous issues in that post. Good on you.
    "Anybody can play. The note is only 20%. The attitude of the motherf*cker who plays it is  80%" - Miles Davis
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  • RMJ said:
    I can empathise entirely with your first point. 
    Same here. Perhaps we need a Dadsnet sub-forum!
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  • SassafrasSassafras Frets: 30273
    You call that a 'slight mistake?




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  • joeyowenjoeyowen Frets: 4025
    Good to have you back man!
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  • FretwiredFretwired Frets: 24601
    Welcome home Drew ... 24 mics and a piano ... great name for a Richter style album .. :-)

    Remember, it's easier to criticise than create!
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  • I must admit, I didn't really know you during *those* times. Sure, we bounced comments on a few threads, but that's about it. 

    I have to say, your return, project focus, positivity and introspection are, in my mind, exactly what this place needs.

    I'm looking forward to seeing what the future holds, and getting to know you better. It would appear that we have quite a few mutual friends as you keep popping up on my suggested friends on fb. 

    Good luck in all you do man. 

    My Trading Feedback    |    You Bring The Band

    Just because you're paranoid, don't mean they're not after you
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  • Fair dues to you for being so upfront and honest about your personal struggles.  Welcome back matey.  
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  • Adam_MDAdam_MD Frets: 3420

    - Fatherhood has been a difficult thing to grasp. I have good days and I have bad days.
    I can sympathise with that one we’re 18 weeks in with our little dude and there’s been a definite learning curve for me.  
    I’m trying to stay more upbeat at home cause I don’t want him growing up with his dad putting himself down or getting pissed off over insignificant bullshit.
    I also really miss playing music I haven’t picked up a guitar since the day before he was born.  I always played for at least an hour everynight but by the time I get in from work help his mum, get him to bed I just want to relax for a while and can’t seem to get the motivation to play.  
    I even bought a boss katana before he was born so I could play at night without turning on my pedal board and a valve amp but just can’t seem to find the motivation to do it.

    Im hoping I get that back soon.  

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  • LuttiSLuttiS Frets: 2243
    Adam_MD said:

    - Fatherhood has been a difficult thing to grasp. I have good days and I have bad days.
    I can sympathise with that one we’re 18 weeks in with our little dude and there’s been a definite learning curve for me.  
    I’m trying to stay more upbeat at home cause I don’t want him growing up with his dad putting himself down or getting pissed off over insignificant bullshit.
    I also really miss playing music I haven’t picked up a guitar since the day before he was born.  I always played for at least an hour everynight but by the time I get in from work help his mum, get him to bed I just want to relax for a while and can’t seem to get the motivation to play.  
    I even bought a boss katana before he was born so I could play at night without turning on my pedal board and a valve amp but just can’t seem to find the motivation to do it.

    Im hoping I get that back soon.  

    Took me close to 18 months before i really picked up a guitar again for longer than a couple of minutes when mine came along.. i'm almost 2 ½ years in now and it's still not a regular thing :/
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  • CloudNineCloudNine Frets: 4254
    Welcome back Drew, good to have you around.

    Being a parent is challenging, don't sweat it. You won't have the answers for everything, there is no 'right way' to do it, you just need to get on and do it your way, and I guarantee that way will be just fine. (Providing you are remembering to feed them, and not battering f*ck out of them every day)

    And I am sure your driving is just fine. However, if you could just update this thread with the times and dates you will be out on the roads for lessons etc, that would be appreciated.
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  • jonevejoneve Frets: 1468
    Adam_MD said:

    - Fatherhood has been a difficult thing to grasp. I have good days and I have bad days.
    I can sympathise with that one we’re 18 weeks in with our little dude and there’s been a definite learning curve for me.  
    I’m trying to stay more upbeat at home cause I don’t want him growing up with his dad putting himself down or getting pissed off over insignificant bullshit.
    I also really miss playing music I haven’t picked up a guitar since the day before he was born.  I always played for at least an hour everynight but by the time I get in from work help his mum, get him to bed I just want to relax for a while and can’t seem to get the motivation to play.  
    I even bought a boss katana before he was born so I could play at night without turning on my pedal board and a valve amp but just can’t seem to find the motivation to do it.

    Im hoping I get that back soon.  

    Ours is 12 months old on Christmas Day and I can say from personal experience that it *does* get easier. Don't get me wrong, there's still bad times and more sleeplessness (teething is a right cunt, it turns out), but once they start to react to you and smiling/laughing when they see you/recognise something they like, it makes it all worth it. 

    But yes, the first 4 months(ish) for us (and the preceding 9 when my wife had sickness 24/7) was hard work and a learning curve that's steeper than Alpe D'Huez. 

    Keep on keeping on mate, I'm sure you're doing a great job, and you'll start to find some time to pick up a guitar once he starts sleeping through a bit more (albeit probably with headphones on :) )
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  • RMJRMJ Frets: 1274
    The thing I struggle with about kids is everyone bleats on about how they are supposed to make you happy. In some cases yes, they make you feel happier than you've ever been. But in others they descend you into a pit of chaos and despair. I've not been able to strike the right balance in nearly 6 years and it takes it's toll. 
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  • crunchmancrunchman Frets: 11414
    RMJ said:
    The thing I struggle with about kids is everyone bleats on about how they are supposed to make you happy. In some cases yes, they make you feel happier than you've ever been. But in others they descend you into a pit of chaos and despair. I've not been able to strike the right balance in nearly 6 years and it takes it's toll. 
    At 6, you might be close to being able to get some respite by letting them sit in front of Youtube for hours.  It's so tempting!

    We are really having to ration their screen time.
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