Band engagement: when is it time to say enoughs enough?

Jetfire

So new band is in the pipeline and we've managed to have one rehearsal with current set up about a month ago. What I'm finding really frustrating is the drummer is taking days to respond to the Facebook group chat (despite being online and posting things).  I find this really difficult as I like to get a plan together. A few things have happened (singer sickness ) meaning we have had to cancel practises and I've ask everyone if they are still game, to which they are.


Is it just me but is 4/5 days to get a response abit much?  

Strangefan

Yup that's rediculous, shame he's the hardest to replace ;(

Mark1960

The art of communication is finding out which method people respond to best, and use that method. It may be different for each band member. However if the band member is a twat, it makes little difference.

WeZ84

Try to find a day when every band member and the rehearsal space is available at the same time.
Then try and stick to it every week (or however often you want to rehearse).

In my current band we rehearse on a Tuesday night. Some weeks we don't but it is always a Tuesday.
However, we're lucky that the place we currently rehearse is always free that night whether we book it or not.

In a previous band, at first we didn't have a regular night mainly because we were trying to rehearse at a busy rehearsal studio that would often get booked up by other bands meaning that we would have to keep re-arranging to fit in with the availability of the room and the people. This got frustrating especially for me as I was the one trying to get the rooms booked and contact the rest of the band - this was before Whatsapp group chats!

Also even if someone can't make the regular slot, still try and meet up and work on something.
That way you can try and keep some of the momentum going and the other members might be more likely to return at the next rehearsal.

If all that fails then you need to find some replacements that are more reliable.

Jetfire

Yeah, we are regular tbf. But due to the singer having hearing problems we've had to hold off.

To be fair, I've got agreement earlier in the week that were having a return practise on Wednesday next week, booked it and told the group chat. Problem is, the drummer hasn't looked at the group chat for 3/4 days (currently) despite being on line and posting cat videos etc. 

Funkfingers

Your drummer is either severely inconsiderate or is extracting the micturition. 

If that drummer plays in more than one band, the other bands are being given priority over yours. It is almost as if the drummer is hoping to be notified of other projects so as to excuse himself from attending yours.

It is possible that your drummer has issues with authority figures. It is possible that he thinks he can get away with his behaviour because he has the rest of the band over a barrel.

OPTION 1
Remind your current drummer that all band members are expendable. A metaphorical boot up the arse might get him to show greater commitment. 

OPTION 2
Discretely seek a replacement drummer. If/when you find one, stop notifying the current drummer of rehearsal and gig times. For a bit of fun, see how long it takes him to notice and/or complain that he is being left out of the loop.

p90fool

Funkfingers said:

OPTION 2
Discretely seek a replacement drummer. If/when you find one, stop notifying the current drummer of rehearsal and gig times. For a bit of fun, see how long it takes him to notice and/or complain that he is being left out of the loop.

Just do this. He's not interested, and you haven't even started yet.

Some venues apply a scattershot technique to finding a replacement band at short notice and I need answers about availability fast so we get in first, while all the old codgers in other bands are still writing letters to each other. 

Musicwolf

Mark1960 said:

The art of communication is finding out which method people respond to best, and use that method. It may be different for each band member. However if the band member is a twat, it makes little difference.

I agree

Last few bands;

2 guys working shifts (different patterns) plus I do a fair bit of business travel.  Greatest distance between band members approx 50 miles - we made it work.

Band where we had our own rehearsal space, no shifts, max distance 25 miles - disaster  People prioritising 5-a-side football, scouts and god over music.

Current band.  No shifts but 40 mile spread - no problem.

If people want to make it work then you can usually find a way because people are prepared to make sacrifices.  If the band isn't really doing it for them or being in a band isn't so important then it'll never happen.  There are a lot of guys out there who like the idea of being in a band but are less enthusiastic about the reality.  Don't waste your time with them, they'll just drain the energy that you clearly have.

Jalapeno

Jetfire said:

What I'm finding really frustrating is the drummer .....

Just leave it at that ....

Mark1960

Jalapeno said:

Jetfire said:

What I'm finding really frustrating is the drummer .....

Just leave it at that ....

Drummers are indeed strange creatures IMHO. Every one i've rehearsed / performed with has had issues of one sort or another, with the exception of one, a lovely straight forward girl called Suzanne. Perhaps all future drummers should female...?

Jetfire

As it goes, this drummer is female

Lestratcaster

Last band I was in had this issue, original lineup rehearsed every Weds/Thurs pretty much each week and we had good momentum. Even if a member couldn't make it we still songwrote or held a meeting.

Original bassist left, and the replacement lived so far away he never got to practice on time and we ended up not rehearsing on the same evening each week anymore. He would be the one to suggest to cancel a practice if he couldn't make it as for some reason we couldn't rehearse a member down.

We had a FB chat thread to communicate but our drummer (funnily enough) was the one who was on it the least. That meant one of us had to call/text him to remind him of practices and stuff like that.

You need to obviously find a balance between being busy and prompt replies, and you need the right people to be available on a consistent basis otherwise its never going to work. I left this band about 18 months ago and they haven't done much since.

WiresDreamDisasters

Mark1960 said:

However if the band member is a twat, it makes little difference.

This is the truth.

Funkfingers

Jetfire said:

As it goes, this drummer is female

Actually, biologically, female or merely self-identifying as?

hotpickups

I've sooo been here. It is finding the best form of communication for individuals sometimes and although it might be inconvenient one just has to call them up or leave a message that way. It means having to repeat yourself a lot with conversations elsewhere from other band members and I agree it's a massive ball ache.

Have you spoken to him/her about this and ask if he/she can improve the situation? If it continues then personally I'd have to let him him/her go because you can't run a band like that imo. My motto is the band will only go as fast as the slowest band member. It's true Sometimes I think of just going out with backing tracks so I don't have deal with like that