Band monogamy

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  • digitalscreamdigitalscream Frets: 26465
    edited April 2022
    Well, it looks like my band's about to fold because of this. The drummer, singer and bassist are all in other bands, and to give you an idea...it's taken two weeks for the singer and the drummer to get the calendar up to date. The bassist doesn't have a computer, and it's apparently too hard to do it on a phone because her other bands use BAND.us for the calendar...and, because she's in at least two other bands, she's busy most weekends anyway.

    The other guitarist has now got bored with playing guitar and bought himself a new camera and is busy booking up photo shoots every weekend (yet still hasn't organised the one for his own band).

    Oh, and I've just discovered that the singer's away at least two, sometimes three weeks of each month with work.

    The result of all this is that there isn't a single month until August where we can actually get a gig and a rehearsal within weeks of each other.

    But, of course, they're all pissing and moaning that we haven't got any gigs booked...which was the reason for me badgering them to update the calendar two bloody weeks ago.

    I'm genuinely losing the will to do anything with it. Fighting musicians to be able to play music is the total opposite of fun. I always said that I'd stop playing in bands if there was no prospect of even vague success by the time I was 45.

    Turned 45 yesterday.

    UPDATE: Band collapsed due to the other guitarist being a whiny dickhead about it and me losing patience with him. Feel significantly better than I thought I would, actually.
    <space for hire>
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  • mudslide73mudslide73 Frets: 3049
    I think it can effect the amount of homework you can do if the material isn't compatible. I used to really struggle when I had two new 40 song sets to learn. It's OK once you're adding 3 or 4 at a time. I'm just down to one covers band with a very big setlist now.
    "A city star won’t shine too far"


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  • TheBigDipperTheBigDipper Frets: 4722
    Well, it looks like my band's about to fold because of this. The drummer, singer and bassist are all in other bands, and to give you an idea...it's taken two weeks for the singer and the drummer to get the calendar up to date. The bassist doesn't have a computer, and it's apparently too hard to do it on a phone because her other bands use BAND.us for the calendar...and, because she's in at least two other bands, she's busy most weekends anyway.

    The other guitarist has now got bored with playing guitar and bought himself a new camera and is busy booking up photo shoots every weekend (yet still hasn't organised the one for his own band).

    Oh, and I've just discovered that the singer's away at least two, sometimes three weeks of each month with work.

    The result of all this is that there isn't a single month until August where we can actually get a gig and a rehearsal within weeks of each other.

    But, of course, they're all pissing and moaning that we haven't got any gigs booked...which was the reason for me badgering them to update the calendar two bloody weeks ago.

    I'm genuinely losing the will to do anything with it. Fighting musicians to be able to play music is the total opposite of fun. I always said that I'd stop playing in bands if there was no prospect of even vague success by the time I was 45.

    Turned 45 yesterday.

    UPDATE: Band collapsed due to the other guitarist being a whiny dickhead about it and me losing patience with him. Feel significantly better than I thought I would, actually.
    45? You're just coming into your prime! Happy birthday, BTW...  

    Not for you specifically, but in general, I have a book called "Bandalism", written by Julian Ridgway in 2007. It's quite funny and describes all the ways you (collectively) can "vandalise" your own band. For those, like me and digitalscream, who like banging their heads against brick walls yet hate it at the same time, it can be a humorous rebalancing for your soul. 
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  • Have normally been a one-man-band whenever I played in them for 15 years. A couple of members were in other bands but this made it hard to get together to rehearse and play shows as availability was hard to match up as well documented in other posts on here. Also alot if not all had full time jobs then would use the weekends to spend with gf's/wives etc meaning the only real time was in the evenings for about 1.5 hours. The last band I played in we were under management and one guy was in 2 bands, one show was double booked (which I incidentally had to fill in for) and they got a bit funny about it. Think that was the only show that clashed. For some people they have to play in multiple bands across different genres or covers bands for income. None of the bands I played in was for money. Just enjoyment.
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  • horsehorse Frets: 1563
    When I joined a.slightly more serious tribute band a few years back, they were ok with me doing other things, but the agreement was that everybody had to keep Friday and Saturday nights free for that band, apart from up the 4 weeks away. E.g. if I didn't have a tribute gig in my diary, I could play another gig on a Saturday in 3 or 4 weeks time. I did get fired by one other band for agreeing to that, but as I told them - they have gigs and it pays well...

    One solution where logistics take the fun out of playing is to do different things - I play in a monthly funk jam at a rehearsal studio - 3 hour session, sociable, fun and no strings or frustrations around gig arrangements etc. I love it
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  • koneguitaristkoneguitarist Frets: 4125
    edited May 2022
    I’ve always been a one band man, yet have always depped in other bands. Priority was always my band though.
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