A poem wot I just wrote

DiscoStu

I was in IKEA on my own, hungry and bored...

Fifteen meatballs on a plate.

"They're from Sweden, they taste great!"

My girlfriend she does highly rate

the flat pack meal of dreams.

I've never really been a fan,

they're just like Campbell's from a can

but with a fold out store floor plan.

The flat pack meal of dreams.

But then I tried the berries red

whilst in the blue and yellow shed

and now I'd go with what she said

About the flat pack meal of dreams.

SidNewton

Not a patch on the one I wrote for a work colleague last week

Roses are red

Violets are blue

You're fucking ugly

The end.

For some reason they didn't like it

proggy

I prefer the IKEA one.

redrighthand

It might sound odd, it might sound crazy
It might just please your lady, maybe
If next time you also try some gravy
On your flat pack meal of dreams.

robgilmo

I have a poem about Ikea,  ''I furnished my home from Ikea, now after a year all my furniture is falling apart and my house looks shit''

redrighthand

The guy above just has the hump
The DIY clearly had him stumped
That's why he wants to take a dump
On your flat pack meal of dreams

:-)

Foster

robgilmo

Nope I kid you not, all my Ikea furniture is shot, it all fell apart, as soon as I did a fart , in its general direction, its my flatpack nightmare of poo.

stickyfiddle

This is a haiku
Line two;  seven syllables
Yep, it's a haiku

TheMarlin

https://imgur.com/gallery/i32ru

merlin

Ikea....the Macdonalds of furniture. Has anyone seen their latest line of Stratocasters?

BigMonka

stickyfiddle said:

This is a haiku
Line two;  seven syllables
Yep, it's a haiku

Space is limited
In a haiku, so it's hard
To finish what you

Sporky

It's not a haiku
If it has no seasonal
Reference therein

robgilmo

I had to
google
Haiku

BRISTOL86

Screws are missing, parts don't fit
An all too frequent story 
How is it that this hell on earth
Is Stockholm's crowning glory?

I now buy home goods ready made
I feel just like a winner
Last time the table leg collapsed
And I lost half my dinner

It really is a horrid place
A warehouse filled with tat
They do a tidy meatball though, 
Alas, I'll give them that. 

merlin

There once was a man from Dundee
Who wrote Limericks that stopped at line three
He said with a grin

Sporky

There once was a chap from Ballyforan
Whose limericks never did scan
He said "I start well,
but never can tell
how to finish the last line without going over the correct number of syllables"

Gagaryn

To convey one's mood

in seventeen syllables

is very diffic

(c) John Cooper Clarke :-)

Fretwired

Spread me on your kitchen table
oil me, nail me, screw me fast, easy and quick
with such precision you'll find everything fits with just one click
but the anticipated climax of completion is dashed
a screw is missing - oh why did you buy me from Ikea and waste all that cash

TheBlueWolf

I left her sitting there,
With jizz in her hair,
Everyone heard her screams,
Over her flat pack meal of dreams.

robgilmo

No one said that poems have to rhyme, in fact we know they don't, some daffodils waving from afar, the whole syllables while true, does not a poem make, she sat there, on a chair, in the dark , pondering.