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Supportact said: [my style is] probably more an accumulation of limitations and bad habits than a 'style'.
Made for a great clip, but my God what a c0ck-womble.
Thank God we don't play there anymore, was a real chickenwire place.
I bet you have loads of ace stories. We need a pint one day
Haven't gigged enough to have any of these magnificent stories, but if I could share someone elses.
My best friend from school had a big Irish family on one side, all lovely people - but solid farmer stock.
At his wedding reception, we arrived at the local village hall to hear what can only be described as the loudest disco I've ever heard, the DJ they hired clearly had delusions of 'Fat Boy Slim' and was playing so loud it was uncomfortable in the car park.
Walked in to find a lot of his Irish relatives sitting at one end, arms folded with a clear 'this would never happen back home' look on their faces.
The father of my friend, as wide as tall and former tug of war champ had been quietly and not so quietly criticised by his mum all day for it not being a Catholic wedding - goes and asks the DJ 'can you turn it down?'. DJ, clearly not recognising who was in front of him (a man on the edge, who was also paying his fee) - replied 'F**k off, it's my music'.
Recognising the moment for conversation was over, the father threw a frankly impressive straight right, spread the guys nose all over his face and then turned all the knobs down to zero, and snapped them off.
Suspect that was the DJs worse gig!
The funniest one was when we did our pre-gig ritual of having a huddle, downing a vodka, getting on stage, starting the intro to the first song which had the instruments coming in one-by-one, then I noticed a commotion at the back of the audience, someone was making his way to the front, waving his hand and pulling up his trousers - it was our keyboard player. He’d been having a shit.
Supportact said: [my style is] probably more an accumulation of limitations and bad habits than a 'style'.
The most awful onstage moment was when supporting a band who provided the PA but who didn't have any on-stage monitoring. All was ok until the one song where we used a drum machine (I can't remember why and it was a stupid idea I thought since we had a competent drummer, I think it was the singer's idea) and none of us could hear it! We had a vague echo of the FOH mix bouncing off the back wall of the venue so timing was truly abysmal. It was definitely one of those "please let this song end soon" moments.
After the gig I packed the car and was waiting for the other guys so we could clear off and I got cornered by the village nutter. The village nutter on this occasion was female, barking mad and who, for some reason, wanted to pull yours truly. Within half an hour I'd met her entire family (who were also nutters), learned about her family history and she'd also told me all about her favourite subject - the WWII holocaust! There were tyres squealing out the car park that night!
There is no 'H' in Aych, you know that don't you? ~ Wife
Turns out there is an H in Haych! ~ Sporky
Bit of trading feedback here.
We played a gig mid week in a decent little venue in Deptford but the promoter had booked us on a bill with an Aussie indie pop group and a French screamo punk band. We knew what we were getting into but the other two bands were more than a little pissed off having travelled halfway round the world for £50.
Trading feedback here
Apologies for the long post
TL;DR - played a sh*t venue, no one turned up and management were f*cktards
Fortunately after many years of extremely hard slogging, our band now has a great following and plays to full venues every gig these days - but it wasn’t always like that!
About 7 or 8 years ago, my current band were booked to play at a nightclub in Chalfont Saint Peter - way out of our usual catchment area, but we were assured that they had a great rep for live music nights and a strong regular crowd.
So we duly roll up at about 7pm as requested, and the place is locked with no one in sight to ask.
We had only been given a landline number for the club which wasn’t picking up as no one was in.
The club is in the absolute middle of nowhere (bordered on one side by fields and a golf course, and the other side by a residential estate). Alarm bells immediately started ringing – how the hell would punters get here from the main town? There was no hope of passing foot traffic, and the nearest hub of civilization was a few miles down the road. Anyway, we put that thought to one side as it was cold and we were too busy feeling irritated by the fact we couldn’t get in.
After 45mins of waiting, someone turns up to open the doors – no apology. We load in and get on with the setup.
An hour or so later and we’re good to go. We were booked to start playing at 10pm, so had a thorough soundcheck and a drink while we waited.
At 9:50pm, I went to locate the manager to let him know we were good to start. He was nowhere to be found, and the barstaff couldn’t tell me where he was either. They also couldn’t tell me whether it was ok to cut the house music without speaking to the manager for his permission.
So, I went on a wander around the venue trying every door in an effort to find him. Finally, and out of frustration I burst through a door marked “private” to find him in a darkened room, surrounded by half-crushed cans of lager, sprawled across a sofa, in boxers and a grubby string vest which was (and I sh*t you not) pulled up to his armpits, softly rubbing his hairy, exposed belly and breathing wheezily whilst watching the cinematic masterpiece that is Aliens vs Predator…
He seemed annoyed at my interruption, even after explaining to him that it was now 10pm and we were due to start but none of his staff had permission to cut the house music.
Instead, he told me that he’d like us to wait until the movie was over…at 11:30pm I explained we were booked to start at 10pm, and his response was “if you want to get paid, you’ll start at 11:30pm”, before turning back to the TV.
I went back to relay this to the band and as you can imagine we were all a bit ‘miffed’.
I should add that it was now about 10:20pm and the only people in the building, were the bar staff, the band, the drummer’s wife and of course, Rab C Nesbitt out the back watching AvP… So much for this strong regular crowd.
Anyway, at 11:30pm, there’s still no sign of Rab, so I go out back to find him dozing on the sofa. Managed to wake him up and we finally get the go-ahead to start playing, to our drummer’s wife and the bar staff.
At the halfway mark, during our break, a troop of about 15 young ladies enter the building seemingly from out of nowhere, and start dancing to the rock music being pumped out of our PA – excellent, we thought - and just as we were getting ready to go back on with our set of rock!
However, for whatever reason, the club then decided to put on their own music (some sort of hard trance type stuff), drowning ours out – the bevy of rock chicks vanished in less than a minute…
So we played the 2nd half to the drummer’s wife and the bar staff.
When we had finished they had the gall to try and get out of paying us by saying we didn’t bring anyone along… Needless to say we told them exactly what we thought of that, and ended up getting what we were owed, plus a little extra on top – so whilst not a complete disaster, it came pretty close.
The organisers had us playing from about 8pm to no one, then about 10:30 lots of people all turned up and the dancing ensued. 40 miniuts later they had all paired off and gone leaving us to play until midnight and then to reverse the load in, this time down a wet, unlit cast iron fire escape.
Supportact said: [my style is] probably more an accumulation of limitations and bad habits than a 'style'.
I play in a 9 piece ska band - we do a lot of gigs for the mod/scooter crowd - for gigs we dress the part - in mod gear etc...
So when we were booked to play a 'rally' in a town I wont mention we assumed it'd be the usual scooter rally....
We arrive at the gig - the car park, beer garden and venue are entirely mobbed by bikers in full leathers all bearing the name and logo of two specific biker gangs (known in the area for their involvement in 'colourful activities').....
We get inside the venue thinking whats going on - and sure enough there is a rock/metal band setting up on stage. Fair enough - a mistake has been made - no harm done - some petrol money (please) and we'll be on our way - no says the organiser - your the band we want - the 'committee' met and decided we wanted a Ska band.... so the other band were sent on there way (and where very good about it - turns out they'd been canceled anyway).....
So we reluctantly set up thinking we were in the wrong gig and about to be lynched for being the least rock n roll band in the world....
Proves how wrong you can be and that you shouldn't judge a book! Turned out to be a brilliant night - brilliant crowd - well up for it - dancing all night and getting involved and made plenty of new mates!
Got there in the morning and it was pissing it down. We were warned that when coming back later we should drive quite far up the road before turning on to the field, as the first part would be like a swamp and the cars would get stuck.
So I travelled back in the evening, drove off the road and on to the field exactly where I'd been told not to, and my car was sucked down about half way up the wheels.
I had to boot the door and squeeze through to get out, just in time to see the rest of the band appear.
They parked up (where told and without incident) and tried to help push it out but it wouldn't shift an inch.
A few hours later a farmer appears.
"Do you want me to get you out?"
"oh yes please!"
He came back with a tractor and a rope.
"you haven't got a tow bar"
"oh right... No"
"So I'm going to attach it to your bumper"
"oh ok thanks"
"and what are you going to do if it rips your car apart?"
"oh... feel very silly?"
"good lad, come on then"
It worked fine and my 2001 Vauxhall Corsa Comfort was free.
Went in to play the gig, first set was good and we're all laughing about earlier.
Started the second set and by this point it's pitch black outside. A few songs in and the generator goes. We're on stage in total darkness, can't see a fucking thing but can hear 200 people in front of us squawking like headless chickens. We just had to stay completely still and wait what seemed like an age until someone figured out how to get the lights back on.
A bit later and the groom wants to sing, so we do Mustang Sally and he's pretty good to be honest. He starts to leave the stage and we kick in to All Right Now which I've only just learned and I've really been looking forward to it. One of those songs where you glance at the set list and think "ah nice one, I get to play that soon".
He hears me play that first chord and spins on the spot. He's over the fucking moon. The rest of the band kicks in and I can see he's back on stage, this time with the singer's guitar.
I can't remember if he sang on that one, but he definitely nicked the solo and extended it by about 32 bars while I stood there trying to fake a smile as I slowly died inside.
First set ends and the bikers walk the few feet towards us. Really enjoyed the band could we play their charity festival in August? We couldn’t make the date.
Weddings are the worst followed by social clubs.
The problem with weddings is you can’t please everyone coz there’s usually two or three generations there.
One of our recent worst gigs was when we had to set up in a rush with not enough time to sound check.
We arrived at the venue on time but as always, the meal and speeches ran over by 2 hours so we had to sit around waiting for the room to cleared for the evening do.
When we finally got in the room our hearts sank, it had a tiled floor, large glass windows and bifold doors, nice in the summer but it had been p!ssing down all day, so we had to play in a large airless shiny box.. as expected the front of house sound was dreadful.
At least our IEMs wouldn’t be affected by the shite room acoustics.. Wrong the IEMs were playing up too.
No matter what we did the individual mix’s were terrible.
The band has 5 individual mix’s which we control ourselves via our phones and iPads, but no matter what we did the levels were all over the place.
The soundman was tearing his hair out trying to figure out what the hell was going on, while wrestling with sorting the dreadful front of house sound too
It took 5 songs to work out, the bass players DI xlr cable was knackered and one of the iem receivers was upside down so the left channel was right and right was left.
We soldiered on but everyone was on edge and mistakes started creeping in. I drop tune on a couple of songs and forgot to stomp on the pedal and started a song a semitone sharp.
all in all I was glad when that one was over.
<○> Big Norm Feedback
In a seven piece, we were booked for a woman’s surprise 50th birthday party in a local community hall. The place is pretty large and they’ve decked it out with bunting and banners etc. One entire wall is filled with tables packed with a large buffet. A couple of people drift in, we get set up and are ready to go when the birthday girl arrives,
Shortly after, she comes in, blindfolded, and we are supposed to strike up with “Happy Birthday” as they take her blindfold off.
Drum roll, blindfold is removed, we start Happy Birthday and she is presented with a nearly empty room. A total of about six people had turned up! Surprise Surprise!! - nobody likes you ! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!
We played the first half, ate all the grub in the interval, did two songs of the second half and fucked off as the inital six went down to about three!
Chips are "Plant-based" no matter how you cook them
Donald Trump needs kicking out of a helicopter
I'm personally responsible for all global warming