Online threats - advice needed

Foster

Around October/November I started dating a girl who was introduced to me through a friend. Things were OK but come January she decided it wasn't working. Fair enough, these things happen.

Only messaged her a couple of times after to sort some shit out, only for practical reasons and never anything more.

Come late February I get a message on facebook from her new bloke - threatening me to leave her alone, stop harassing her, etc. News to me as I don't know him from Adam and I hadn't been in contact with her. I sent her a message essentially saying to get him to back off or i'll be in touch with his employer - He's a bin man and using threats along the lines of "I know where you live" just isn't cricket. Turns out she'd been lying to him to cover her own tracks and sure enough all was settled. Didn't hear from either of them again.

Today I just received 3 more messages out of the blue from him - again threatening me for the same reasons (haven't contacted either of them) and generally being a bit of a prat. Though I am slightly anxious as I live on my own and i'm rather fond of my cat - I wouldn't like to come home from work to find the house smashed up and said cat injured.

What would be the best course of action to take? I don't reply to his messages, can't be arsed being dragged into some jeremy kyle drama.

octatonic

Contact the Police.

Drew_TNBD

Call the police. Show them the messages. They'll get him to back off. Explain to the police what happened before.

TheBlueWolf

A block is the obvious first choice, the ex too, assuming you've tied up all the loose ends.

Get some screenshots of the messages and file a report with the police. They can't charge him for being a dick, but they'll make him aware a complaint has been made and they'll be knocking on his door first if anything happens to you.

It's not worth trying to engage them any further as they're obviously trouble. If the ex has already admitted lying, what else has she told the Neanderthal?

fob

I'll also suggest reporting it to the police. They may not do anything at all but it's good to have both the actions documented and the fact that you see them as a threat (these things can get twisted later). Please make sure you get a reference number from them to show it is documented.

revsorg

If he has threatened you on Facebook he was silly - they have a system that allows the police to preserve digital evidence.

bingefeller

Definitely go to the police with all evidence you have.  

digitalscream

Threatening behaviour is a criminal offence:

https://www.sentencingcouncil.org.uk/offences/item/threatening-behaviour-fear-or-provocation-of-violence-racially-or-religiously-aggravated-threatening-behaviour/

Get in touch with the authorities, immediately.

professorben

Yep, Police. 

No point trying to manage this yourself, if all goes south in a couple of months time, you will be kicking yourself you didn't flag it earlier. 

Bridgehouse

If he knows where you live you have to question why he hasn't come round and mouthed off to you to your face.

Doing it online just makes him a coward. Report him. He'll prolly cry when the police come round to give him a bollocking.

Sounds to me like he needs to shit or get off the pot.

Gassage

I do think you should speak to the Police but be warned, they'll either want to prosecute or not act. THat's how they are these days (due to pressures put upon them)

Bygone_Tones

Then slap a sign on his bin wagon saying "I know where you work"

Bridgehouse

Bygone_Tones said:

Then slap a sign on his bin wagon saying "I know where you work"

Yes. Unless he's a complete nutter then bullies need to be stood up to and called out.

If he makes a scene he will lose his job. 

digitalscream

If you do call the police, don't down-play it or try to act macho about the whole thing; I know that seems obvious, but it's sometimes difficult to get out of the English mindset of "Well, I don't want to bother you, but...".

They will only act if you have a genuine and realistic fear that he'll follow through with his threats.

holnrew

Find out where he lives and smash his face in

fftc

Would it be wrong to suggest that you just chin the cunt?

Bridgehouse

holnrew said:

Find out where he lives and smash his face in

fftc said:

Would it be wrong to suggest that you just chin the cunt?

Now I should berate you both for such suggestions of violence..


But personally I'd like to see him chinned with a wheelie bin.

Foster

Well following the advice on here - apart from Holnrew's - I've contacted the police

Whilst I was "sorry to bother you, etc" I did maintain that as I live alone and work full time I was concerned there could be damage to my property or that my cat may be harmed as some sort of warning to me.

The police said they consider this harassment and will contact me within 24 hours for more details. I said I was available tomorrow after work and i'm more than happy for the police to look at the messages on my phone, which I think they may well do.

It may be that the police do nothing - but they were glad I raised it because at the very least it provides evidence if something does happen. I think something may happen as he's known to the police and I knew he wore a police tag at some point.

All I want is to sleep easy at night.

Bridgehouse

/\ correct course of action taken.

Good man.

EricTheWeary

fob said:

I'll also suggest reporting it to the police. They may not do anything at all but it's good to have both the actions documented and the fact that you see them as a threat (these things can get twisted later). Please make sure you get a reference number from them to show it is documented.

This exactly...and you've done it. 

holnrew

My comment was tongue in cheek because of all the good advice already given. I've never hit another person