Am I a Mason?

Sporky

Asking for a friend.

I understand that they're very secretive, so how would one know if one had, for instance, been signed up by one's mother when one was very young indeed? 

Bridgehouse

Do you have an apron, a stone chisel and a hammer?

stickyfiddle

I am, to my knowledge, not a mason, but my grandfather was, so I understand I could be one if I wanted. 

Thogh my grandfather was literally Tom Riddle, so I’m not sure it’s a good idea

Sporky

Bridgehouse said:

Do you have an apron, a stone chisel and a hammer?

No, yes, yes.

Erm, I mean my friend says he or she doesn't, does, and does. 

Bridgehouse

In that case you aren’t a mason.

See trad folk music tune - “Mason’s Apron”

munckee

I was offered the magic handshake but politely refused. I thought they might kill me so I didn’t talk about fight club but so far so good. 

Sporky

My friend didn't know the handshake was magic.

What powers does it convey? 

richardhomer

Bridgehouse said:

Do you have an apron, a stone chisel and a hammer?

I think a rolled-up trouser leg and a funny handshake are tell-take signs also....

Sporky

My friend did roll up one trouser leg earlier this evening while pretending to be Purdy while dancing along to the New Avengers intro music to amuse his or her wife.

My friend is concerned that this may factor into the discussion. 

ICBM

Bridgehouse said:

Do you have an apron, a stone chisel and a hammer?

Oooooh.. I do!

I admit I might not be able to get into the apron very easily any more, as it was the one I had in Design & Technology at school when I was about 16.

I have a couple of stone chisels but they've been more often used for cutting off rusted-up nuts on old cars... does that make me a Freemechanic?

Bridgehouse

Hang on. You are talking about people who use stone to craft buildings, statues etc. right?

scrumhalf

Bridgehouse said:

Do you have an apron, a stone chisel and a hammer?

What's Pornhub got to do with it?

Bridgehouse

scrumhalf said:

Bridgehouse said:

Do you have an apron, a stone chisel and a hammer?

What's Pornhub got to do with it?

Tina Turner? I’m well confused now 

m_c

stickyfiddle said:

I am, to my knowledge, not a mason, but my grandfather was, so I understand I could be one if I wanted. 

My grandfather was a lodge leader, but neither of my uncle's ever got involved.
I always thought it was the kind of thing members encouraged their sons to get involved in, but I suspect there's a generation that realised dodgy handshakes/mates clubs were rapidly losing any benefits they had.

My old foreman was a member, and there were a few turned up to his funeral, including one in full dress costume. He just looked like a pretentious prick, kept butting in giving the impression he was someone important, and seemed to annoy a good few people. It was later confirmed by a couple other members, that nobody really liked him and my first impression was pretty accurate.

Dominic

ironically ,they had a recruiting stand at the Alexandra Palace Bike show last weekend next to the st John Ambulance and AA.
Membership must be slow.

robgilmo

Masons, today are simply arseholes, really. stand funny, hand shake stupidly, wear a silly broach.
The origins of the Masons in Medieval times is fascinating, so long as you research properly, modern times? Bollocks, just people looking for reason.

Nikc

I can confirm you are not

Myranda

My old boss was one, they have a lot of rituals, so unless you did them, probably not.

Sorry, unless your friend did the rituals.

He did suggest that it *may* be a front for middle aged men getting hammered and occasionally doing business ...  

solomonguitars

Interesting topic Well if you'll be a mason you'll definitely know that

There's nothing magical in handshakes btw. They just like a silent password pretty much.

Refer to the Masons website for more info, basically it's not about the world domination but rather about upgrading yourself through a series of meditations, thoughts control and tons of books to read. 

scrumhalf

My brother's father in law was grand chief poobah or whatever the title was.

I was approached about joining but refused in the basis that the members seemed to be puffed-up self-important dicks and, worse than that, they didn't allow ladies to attend meetings (too much like the Just William books).

I once made one of the lesser partners at the firm I trained at almost cack himself by giving a handshake that might suggest I was the grand imperial somethng or other.

merlin

You are a Mason. We all are, that is unless you're a shape-shifting reptile. 
At least that's what Icke told me, or it was what he said when he was licking me with his forked tongue. 

But that's another story. Anyone got an R8 to sell me?