What has Drew been up to?

octatonic

WiresDreamDisasters said:

Honestly, it's not that anyone who doesn't do X is living a meaningless life. It's more that anyone who doesn't do 'THEIR OWN PERSONAL X' is living a meaningless life. That's the entire point behind Jordan Peterson's statements on this. It isn't that there is only one way to live life and that everyone should conform to it. It's that internally to yourself you know what life it is you should be living, and if you're not doing it for some reason - fear, insecurity, money, external pressure, etc... - then you're not giving your life the meaning it perhaps could have.

Yeah I agree with that.
Unless of course you think that what you should be doing is murdering people- that probably isn't a good thing to aspire to.

I've mostly always done my own thing- I try not to place too much importance on wrapping my identity up in the things I do.
Well I say that, I probably did that for a long time and eventually realised a) it is bullshit and b) no one cares.
Now I just try to enjoy my life with a minimum of hassle and stress.

WiresDreamDisasters said:

My personal 'X' for the longest time was my band. I don't mind telling you that right now I am getting more satisfaction and enjoyment out of just being a dad and a home guitarist. But honestly that's more to do with the slackness and the dysfunction in the band right now.

I'm currently bandless as well, and whilst it is good to have a break, it is mostly down to there being a very poor music scene in Singapore.
I'm concentrating on other things- mostly my own playing and other projects- I'm studying piano and teaching myself how to do video editing.
I do miss having weekly weekend gigs though.

maidenfan

I find myself often reflecting on parenthood, either my own troubled relationship with both my parents, or my relationship with my own children (8 and 10). Having had a childhood where positive affection and regard were conditional on behaviour / academic performance / public acceptability, I intitially thought that doing the opposite to my parents would be a good start.

However more and more, I turn to the thoughts of Winnicott, a paediatrician and psychoanalyst whom forwarded the notion of the 'good enough' mother, that is to say, there is no such thing as 'perfect' or getting it right all the time. That is not what an infant or child needs, what they need (IMHO) is a parent whom tries, gets it wrong, tries again and again and keeps the child in mind. He also reinforced the importance of a capacity to play. The child looks for his reflection in his mothers eyes (paraphrasing Winnicott again).

Throughout this, I believe there is a parallel process in my own psychic development, something akin to 'turning ghosts into ancestors'.

blueskunk

Ah, good to see you back man. Well done for the positive things you are doing and as for Fatherhood, that’s the toughest ever job right there

peace and respect 

WiresDreamDisasters

blueskunk said:

Ah, good to see you back man. Well done for the positive things you are doing and as for Fatherhood, that’s the toughest ever job right there

peace and respect 

Cheers man - she wouldn't sleep, so we just showed her the neighbours fireworks.

Happy New Year to all!

MrBump

Kids suck.  I picked my 16 year old up this morning at 2am from a NYE party, and I had to be at work for 6.