****ing musicians

Teetonetal

So last night our bass player didn't turn up for practice, when we eventually got hold of him he announced that he is bored and joined a new band and was at their rehearsal.

the sad part of this is that we have just spent the last 3 months training up a new drummer after a 6 month search and we had just started to really gel as a group and were (I thought) looking forward to writing new songs and heading to the studio.

He told us he was bored because of the training up of the new drummer which led to working on only 2 new songs and now he can't be bothered with us any more.

Starting tomorrow we have a series of gigs booked, of which he will only play in a couple as his new band has conflicting dates.

What annoys me is that our last drummer did something similar to us, but offered to play all gigs until we found a replacement, which I thought was decent., At the time though the bass player went nuts about it and nearly ruined the old drummer's offer - which required a lot of smoothing over! Now this. 

I am not sure if I have been unlucky, but this kind of thing seems to happen a lot. Makes you wonder what these guys would do if they ever joined a group that did "make it" and had to play the same songs night after night.... oh well.

DesVegas

It sounds like you need write some exciting songs

gusman2x

Can you maybe punch his face in?

hotpickups

Believe me it's probably for the best in the long run. If he didn't do it now he would have done eventually. It sounds as though he has no humility whatsoever without letting you how he's feeling first before moving on to a new band. Hedging his bets sounds like to me.

It's all about the Bass.......  

Cirrus

What is it about telling the truth that is so hard for people? When I left bands in the past I said straight up that I wanted out and told them why since it was a reasonable, rational position. I didn't just not turn up and let them join the dots.

equalsql

Bah... musicians I feckin' hate them... just glad I'm not one!  :-\"

BilliBob

Some people are just complete assholes. Not just musicians, they are everywhere.  There are also though many many good and decent people who do deal in a civilised and mutually respectful manner.  In my book it costs nothing whatsoever to be straight up with people.  I too have had my share of C**thole band members.  Finally as of last night.  We have a 4 piece with guys who have all been there before and we all get on really well.  All you can do is never lose hope that this time it might be the one that will not only survive but flourish.  It can and does happen though sadly rarely.
Try not to let it get you down and keep at it.  Best of luck.

Teetonetal

It's the not telling us that winds me up, people come and go all the time in bands, I mean trying to find 3+ like minded people who get along, have similar vision, attitude and commitment levels is always difficult, not to mention the fact that people change over time too.

But yeah, be straight about it, if he wants a new challenge we would all understand, but having committed to gigs and dates it would have been nice if he'd honored them and then moved on, we are only talking 6 shows over the next two months.

I had a chat with him this afternoon and it turns out it's all about money, we are a hobby band, playing for the fun of it, this new band tell him that they do 50+ gigs a year and they get paid well, all the time he's been with us he has always complained about doing free shows, or shows for beer/food etc, where as we play any show we think will get a good turnout.

Mooting the idea of searching for a keyboard player to do the bass parts and add something new to our sound... 

I fear though that the singer (who is really the driving force behind the band) is now getting fed up with it and might call it a day, as she is now the only original band member left and I don't think can face going through the search again... we shall see.

monquixote

It never ceases to amaze me what total wankers musicians can be. 

I'm loving my current band as everyone can both play and gives a shit, but I've had some appalling experiences with people who just don't show up and when they do are rude and lazy. 

John_P

That is well out of order.     
To just leave when you have gigs lined up without saying anything obviously leaves you in an awkward situation, sounds like you're being a lot calmer than I would be...   why not just say how he feels so you can have a chance to sort things out.    

I guess in the long run you're better of without him but that doesn't help right now.    Have you got anyone who can dep while you find someone else.

Teetonetal

John_P said:

That is well out of order.     
To just leave when you have gigs lined up without saying anything obviously leaves you in an awkward situation, sounds like you're being a lot calmer than I would be...   why not just say how he feels so you can have a chance to sort things out.    

I guess in the long run you're better of without him but that doesn't help right now.    Have you got anyone who can dep while you find someone else.

Yup, I teach guitar and 1 of my students is going to help out and fill in the lows for us going to do simplified versions of the bass lines for ease with a only the important bits note for note. Nice for my student too as she gets to cut her live playing teeth! 

randomhandclaps

"****ing musicians" - Is the question how did Patsy Kensit get on despite being an appalling actress?

jd0272

randomhandclaps said:

"****ing musicians" - Is the question how did Patsy Kensit get on despite being an appalling actress?

Getting her minge out when she wasn't a fucking mess would be my guess.

Alnico

I have been trying to find a band for a while now.

I have decent kit, a car and time on my hands. I'm as reliable as the sunrise and i simply can;t find any group of people who even care.

I don't care about money, i just want to play and enjoy it.

It seems that finding 4 people who feel the same about music as me is almost the hardest thing i've ever tried to do.

Roland

I've said it before. To be in a band you have to be able turn up and play. Most aspiring band members fail at step one

guitarfishbay

It sucks. You've just got to keep going though - your choices are carry on or quit. When it comes to keeping the rest of the band together I think you've got to act quick and steady the ship, sounds like you're doing that with using a student short term.

I have been through this far too many times myself as I'm sure many have here. The toughest part is keeping morale up IMO - there are always more musicians but for the band it has to stay enjoyable while things get sorted out.

Best of luck.

Handsome_Chris

Here is a bit of an odd question, but does turning up and not being a dick outweigh playing skill?  In other words, does being polite/considerate and reliable beat virtuosity?

EricTheWeary

Over time yes, I think. Quite a few famous musos who got sacked for unreliability at points in their careers. if you are at the amateur/ semi-pro end no one is indispensable.

hugbot

One of my friends bands singer just took a train home one day in the middle of a long tour and never played with them again.

Teetonetal

Handsome_Chris;436733" said:

Here is a bit of an odd question, but does turning up and not being a dick outweigh playing skill?  In other words, does being polite/considerate and reliable beat virtuosity?

Yes, i think so. In my book anyway. As long as the skill level is enough, then everyone honouring commitments makes for a far more enjoyable band to be in.

Phil_aka_Pip

Teetonetal said:

Handsome_Chris;436733" said:

Here is a bit of an odd question, but does turning up and not being a dick outweigh playing skill?  In other words, does being polite/considerate and reliable beat virtuosity?

Yes, i think so. In my book anyway. As long as the skill level is enough, then everyone honouring commitments makes for a far more enjoyable band to be in.

What do you do when the skill level really isn't good enough AND the level of commitment isn't good enough either? (BTW it's not my band, and the decision-making is entirely collective so there's no way the duffers and the non-committeds are going to get voted out; if I quit it would look like an insult to them that do have the skills and are committed)