fed up with my band

midlifecrisis

wasnt sure whether to post this in case one of them saw this( i dont think they will)  but doesnt matter anyway as im gonna have it out with them tonight.  Ive been the principal gig getter,  which i dont mind, im quite good at it. But earlier in the year i asked them to give me all their unavailable dates so i could just offer pubs what we had available.  Last year i got them about 25 gigs, i could have got many more but fair enough if they had obligations)   this year one member has given me 25 weekends he cant do,, thats half the fucking year.  the others havny given me anything, despite me nagging.   They want to work on the system that i get the gig then contact them and see if they can do it. one guy is notorious for not looking at his phone messages.   long and short ive had to turn down about 20 gigs  because one member (not always the same one) cant do it.  we are down to about a handful of gigs now to the end of the year.  Theses guys are good fun and im fond of them and i dont want to give them grief but i feel now our objectives for the band are not the same.

EricTheWeary

I'm rubbish at getting gigs, I should put you on commission for us!

It does sound like they have switched off a bit and might be looking for excuses not to do gigs, hoping that someone else is the one to call it a day first.

midlifecrisis

you could be bang on Eric.  they do enjoy the gigs but i know one of them is happy just to rehearse every week as its an excuse to get out the house and go for a drink after. My feeling at this moment is to resign,  il see out the remaining gigs with them or until they replace me, and not do anymore rehearsals.

slacker

Start a new band with clear goals and procedures (any available date can be booked for a gig) and carry on booking gigs next year. 

Handsome_Chris

Fed up with my band!!! This thread again.   @Emp_Fab, please may we have a section for this?

@Midlifecrisis, as a shift worker, I'm a fan of your comrade who has told you when he's not available.  You can plan for that, I'd be able to look at swapping shifts, or banging in leave, if the gig was worth it - they usually all are.  

Are you a covers/function band, or a band that performs original material?  I believe that it's harder to get bookings if you do mostly own stuff, which is why I believe that it can be a bit of a bugbear as you have to take the gigs as you get 'em.

thomasross20

I went through this recently. 

Better to just have it out. 

I said I was quitting. We had a band meeting. Some things got resolved. I'm back in. decent bunch and I enjoy it. 

To be honest, I'm crap at getting gigs - well done, OP! I've asked our lot if they'd be willing to play Glasgow or 2 times a week - some have the goal and drive to do that but others I think would rather not. I say go with the flow. If you're really unhappy then leave but if it's ok and you think it'd be tricky to find another band... up to you. 

Let us know how it goes!

BenSirAmos

If you are that good at getting gigs, you are a really valuable musician and I don't think you'd have too much trouble finding another band to join. If you have the desire, you could join another band while staying in your current one.  

Danny1969

Maybe you could find a guy who's happy to dep for your most unavailable band member, that might free up the calander a bit. I have a guy who deps for me in one band and it works out ok, means the band can gig even if I'm not available 

To anyone scoring gig's - once you have done one good gig at a venue and they wanna book again tell them your do it at your discounted  lesser price if they book 4 dates. A discount for them, more gigs for you. We got 62 gigs booked already for next year using that kinda approach 

John_P

I use online calendars so people can say when they are unavailable  - if they don't update it and can't do a gig, then they have to sort the change of date or organise their own dep.     I'd tell them how you feel and make them take more responsibility for their diaries - easier said than done sometimes. 

Danny1969

John_P said:

I use online calendars so people can say when they are unavailable  - if they don't update it and can't do a gig, then they have to sort the change of date or organise their own dep.     I'd tell them how you feel and make them take more responsibility for their diaries - easier said than done sometimes. 

Yeah I'm on a shared Hotmail calandar, If I haven't got unavailable on a date it's assumed I'm available which makes it a lot easy to book stuff.

ICBM

midlifecrisis said:

They want to work on the system that i get the gig then contact them and see if they can do it.

Then they don't want to gig very much in future, because booking a gig and then cancelling - hence pissing off the venue by making them have to find another band and do their work twice - is one of the quickest ways to not get any repeat bookings.

martinw

I had the exact same issue with a band I was in until a couple of years ago.

Liked them a lot, enjoyed the gigs, but problems as you laid out above. They were happy rehearsing once a week and sporadic gigs....it had started off at 20+ a year, then you could clearly tell they'd had enough.

I stuck with them for over 6 years, which was too long in retrospect. I left and am now with a band I'm much more suited to, where we're all on the same wavelength.

midlifecrisis

update,  i aired my concerns last night. quite constructive, if they do what they say i should have a proper list of unavailable dates but i suspect there will be many. Even tho, I have lined myself up for an audition next week and will continue looking to join a new band. I will honour the next few gigs with them tho but im not going to get them anymore. I will save my contacts for any new projects i join

dunstanmus

Reading this - you need to be moving on mate.

thomasross20

Get this, as well as bassist wanting his girlfriend to work the sound desk, he now wants her to do the breaks at two of our next gigs........!!!

robinbowes

thomasross20 said:

Get this, as well as bassist wanting his girlfriend to work the sound desk, he now wants her to do the breaks at two of our next gigs........!!!

"do the breaks"? You mean DJing?

thomasross20

I mean singing some songs with the rest of the band (not me) playing.......!! Like karaoke or something. It's way too incestuous for me

ICBM

So you mean the rest of the band don't get a break? That will be popular...

Or he thinks he's just going to replace you with her. Good luck with that.

thomasross20

Totally weird... she's already in to do sound (and to be honest I'd rather pay somebody over the odds who knows what they're doing). Now piggy-backing onto the rest of us to fill in the slots... It's not right.

Roland

Ulterior motive?

vasselmeyer

Tom, you need to get shot of that lot. They really are screwing you about. Put yourself out there on joinmyband.co.uk with links to a couple of videos of you playing and move on.

From what I've seen you're easily the best musician in the band and you should be able to slot right into another covers group with very little hassle.