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My son also couldn’t pronounce some of his words. In the family we still call milk “nilk” and yogurt “nogurt”. His favourite dinner was always “hoffages”.
Seriously: If you value it, take/fetch it yourself
Early the next morning (about 4am) the lorry driver next to us started to wake and start banging and clattering stuff outside of his lorry (probably making breakfast) which managed to wake my parents up (and me obviously).
My Dad said to my Mum - "I wish that lorry driver would fuck off" which I must have overheard
So me being the helpful 3 year old I was, knocked on the window and started shouting "OI LORRY DRIVER FUCK OFF"
Much to say, we didn't sleep much more and we were on the road early that morning....
I'm sure the dude wasn't overly bothered as he just smiled. Probably understanding thats how a little kid would see things, and had heard it all before. Me however massively embarrased wanted the floor to swallow me up so I took our rentals, paid, and left before explaining to her in the car.
The yard is nothing but a fence, the sun just hurts my eyes...
Another one one to make you chuckle,
my friend’s youngest son was about 4 when he suddenly developed a real fear of sitting on the toilet. He would happily stand at the toilet to wee but refused point blank to sit on the toilet. He would kick out, bite, head butt, anything to avoid being picked up and put onto the toilet. He was not a violent lad so something was obviously causing it but my friend did not know what. As time passed it became a problem as he was refusing to poo and started getting stomach pains. He then started pooing and hiding the evidence in his bedroom and other places (which lead to me asking my friend one day if there was any reason why there was a turd going round in her washing machine, up against the glass on the door!! The little sod had hidden one in the washing machine!!)
Eventually, one day my friend physically made him sit on the loo and he turned hysterical, crying and lashing out. My friend asked him again what was wrong and he said “I don’t want to get eaten by the dinosaurs”. My friend realised that he had seen the scene in Jurassic Park where the bloke sat on the loo gets eaten, as her sister had had the film on when they visited a few weeks previously!!
Just goes to show the things kids notice and take in.
Was chatting to my aunt on the phone a little while ago and she was telling me about a special family dinner she was preparing. Particularly the lovely orgasmic potatoes and carrots she had bought!!!! Oh dear......
Another one, my step son who was 4 at the time had an imaginary Stuart Little he used to carry around in the palm of his hand. We were at the In Laws for dinner (prim and proper, Sunday morning church goer types). Suddenly he shouts out "Fucking Hell, Iv forgotten Stuart". Fortunately they saw the funny side but did wonder where he could have possibly picked that up from
My band - Crimson on Silver For sale - Blackstar HT-5S
Gear - Guitars, amps, effects and shizz. Edited for Phil_aka_Pip, who is allergic to big long lists.