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And talking about really stupid, ridiculous injuries - on Saturday I had a sudden coughing fit and something just "went" in my lower back. It was bloody agony. I'm still hobbling around three days later, although I don't think I've done anything too serious.
I worked in a design office in the 80s, drawing boards scalpels etc. I share a problem with my dad in that my feet get too hot being encased in shoes all day, so I potter around in socks (still do to this day). I had three bad injuries there. We used to boil water for a cuppa with this electric coil that you stuck in a mug of water. Mine was on the floor under my desk, I forgot it and kicked it over. Incredibly painful, the boiling water caused MASSIVE blisters over my foot, about 6 of them.
One time when busy I ran down the office (in socks of course), a scalpel blade that I hadn't noticed flipped up and I trod on it, ramming it almost an inch up into my foot. I pulled it out swearing violently (I never swear in public), hopped to the nearest sink and stuck my foot in. Blood everywhere! Damn was that painful.
The worst: Another time that I ran down the office (yeah, we got real busy at times!) A brass plate on the floor that was covering a plug socket flipped up. I effectively kicked it hard, it rammed right underneath my big toe nail, wedging my sock up into the gap having prized the nail up. Excruciatingly painful, and more so tugging the sock out! Much swearing again and needless to say I lost the nail a few days later.
At my current job some 20 years ago, I was trimming a rush job very quickly with a scalpel and a ruler. A slight misjudgement and I lopped the end of a finger off! The blood squirted out about 10 inches! I held it in a ton of tissues to stem the blood flow and rang the work nurse. She was a notoriously cantankerous and unhelpful woman. I said to her "It's an emergency, I just chopped the end of my finger off!" and her reply was "I'm just going off to a course, ring a first aider" and she slammed the phone down!
My most annoying injury was over 30 years ago. I was a long distance runner and I would do 10 mile road races. I was also a street skater. I was a week away from my main race of the year. I decided to go out on my skates (they were expensive Bauer skates), and having worn down the stoppers I found some in a junk shop for 50p, so I put them on instead of forking out £4.50 for proper ones. They were the wrong size and the wrong rubber, they caught on a wheel and stopped me dead throwing me to the pavement and badly bashing my knee. I was worried that I would miss the run next week, but in actual fact I couldn't run for a whole year, and I never again went to a running club for the rest of my life. It was a total ****** bummer and all because I didn't spend another £4!!!!!
My best friend and I used to go everywhere on our bikes and one day we rode a couple of miles up the coast to an old village on the shores of the Severn estuary, we used to go there a lot to be fair and mess around on the cliffs and look for old fishing tackle that had been left behind.
We were messing around on the rocks and mud flats under the cliffs when a couple of older boys showed up and started making trouble. First they started being mouthy and were gunning for some kind of a scrap and when we didn't bite they started throwing stuff from off the cliffs at us.
We hid under the cliffs so they couldn't see us and take aim at us. For some reason I decided to make a run for it and bolted from under the cliff to the path back up to where we'd left our bikes - I possibly thought these older kids might take off with them.
I was about halfway to the path when one of the kids on the cliff threw a fist sized pebble at me. I saw it coming and watched as it missed........... hit a nearby boulder sticking out of the mud and ricocheted straight into my bollocks.
I've been kicked in the nads before but nothing has ever come close to the level of torturous pain I felt that day. I don't know how but I made it the couple of miles home, all the while my mate is telling me that screaming in agony won't make the pain go away (tosser). I was scared to check my junk and was convinced they were going to be bloodied and black with bruising.
Fortunately they were just a bit tender for a few days and no other harm came from it but boy did that hurt. I never, ever want to experience anything like that again!
There is no 'H' in Aych, you know that don't you? ~ Wife
Turns out there is an H in Haych! ~ Sporky
Bit of trading feedback here.
I ask you...who cuts themselves whilst washing their pants? Fucking me.
The only idiotic one I can think of is trying to cut grass in the garden as a kid with a small pickaxe. Swung it straight into my left foot. The scar is still there.
I've avoided all stupid injuries since then by taking the correct precautions and wearing the right safety gear.
Here I am about to slice a lemon.
Offset "(Emp) - a little heavy on the hyperbole."
Too much info ?
She fainted from the sight of the bleeding by the way.
Offset "(Emp) - a little heavy on the hyperbole."