little things online sellers add to their listings that don't do anything for you.

Sassafras

scrumhalf said:

AllthegearNoidea said:

Sassafras said:

As soon as they call a guitar 'she' I feel so sick I can't carry on reading all the way through whatever else they say.

This

Can you misgender a guitar?

My guitar would hate to be called 'she' because he's a misogynist.

usedtobe

Daved756 said:

usedtobe said:

If it’s on Facebook, and they say “inbox me”..

Are you still talking about guitars?

Lol. Yeah, guitars, but it would be a turn off, whatever..

fretfinder

'It owes me £???...' What does that even mean? And I don't care!

'Trem arm [or other key part] missing but it's easy to obtain a replacement.'  If it's that easy why aren't you obtaining the replacement yourself so you can sell the guitar without issues?

Phil_aka_Pip

Clashman said:

Lol....
https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Unique-bass-guitar-for-people-who-don-t-give-a-sh-t/273037834799?hash=item3f9252ba2f:g:JZMAAOSwYNxaUgHY

excellent advert

prowla

"Miniature" - If I wanted a bloody model I'd be looking in the ornaments section!

Fishboy7

Smoke and Pet free home...... ?

https://goo.gl/images/bKYJS2

BBBlues

Countdown timers on "deals"

Teetonetal

I'm always happy to see pet and smoke free home. Heavy smoking indoors really impregnates everything.

chris78

I’m selling my £300 guitar for £500 because I’ve upgraded it heavily.

My partscaster sounds better than any custom shop guitar I’ve played.

These retail at £1,079 now. Only got a few dings. Bargain at £1,000.

Anything listed as rare.

Anything listed as vintage when it’s made in the 80s

These guitars are only going to go up in value.

This was the best year for these.

Tonnes of mojo (its beat up)

I could go on all night 

adamm82

Teetonetal said:

I'm always happy to see pet and smoke free home. Heavy smoking indoors really impregnates everything.

The warning on the pack said it may have the opposite effect. 

mort

Here’s one I’ve just seen on eBay that ticks a few of the boxes;

I don’t user her very often as she is a weighty beast. So it’s best that she goes to a new home and gets played.

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Gibson-Les-Paul-Custom/282819939861?hash=item41d961ce15:g:jxEAAOSw9NBaZydn

Nitefly

"Got to sell because I need funds for car/wife/pet/house deposit" ...

followed by "would consider trades for" ...

thegummy

Regarding the "will only go up in value" thing - it's something Lee Anderton says about Les Pauls too but is it even true?

People pay through the nose for 50s LPs but are ones from, say, the 90s actually worth more than they cost new?

I'd be surprised if any modern guitars actually gain value unless it's a very special limited run or something maybe.

Fishboy7

mort said:

Here’s one I’ve just seen on eBay that ticks a few of the boxes;

I don’t user her very often as she is a weighty beast. So it’s best that she goes to a new home and gets played.

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Gibson-Les-Paul-Custom/282819939861?hash=item41d961ce15:g:jxEAAOSw9NBaZydn

..... Ah and "Happy bidding" is another 

Luminous

My favourite was " Recently tuned "

I'm also a fan of the putting everything in caps and sounding angry...NO OFFERS, DONT TEXT ( dont put your number up then ), I WONT ACCEPT CALLS, NO TIMEWASTERS......I was going to reply to that but I'm a timewaster so I won't...

Blueingreen

"Re-listed due to (sic) time waster." = "I'm still in a mighty strop because a previous deal fell through.  I'm convinced it was 100%  the other guy's fault, although in view of my Mr Angry persona you're probably suspecting the exact opposite."

usedtobe

Any variation on “these Indonesian (or wherever) ones from 10 (or whenever) years ago, are far superior to the new Chinese ones..”

samothy01

One I was recently looking at...

”serial number is photoshopped out for security reasons”

BloodEagle

I’ve often wondered about that, why do people cover up the serial numbers on their guitars in photos? I mean, who gives a shit what the serial number is, is the concern that some shadowy cartel is going to take the serial number and use it to clone the guitar and steal the owners house/wife?

samothy01

BloodEagle said:

I’ve often wondered about that, why do people cover up the serial numbers on their guitars in photos? I mean, who gives a shit what the serial number is, is the concern that some shadowy cartel is going to take the serial number and use it to clone the guitar and steal the owners house/wife?

...yes