I'm hopeless when anyone is watching me..

grappagreen

Grunfeld said:

grappagreen said:

I'm going to follow up on the hypnosis thing to see if that can help for sure....

It really can.  I don't know if you saw what I wrote before I edited it out (cos I get sick of the sound of my own voice sometimes), but basically, I've used hypnosis as a clinician to help people with performance anxiety and it can really help.  Check with the practitioner that they have experience with working with people with performance anxiety.  Have fun! 

Thanks for this.

Is there a recognised body/association for hypnotherapists? Just want to know the best place to start.

Thanks again,

Si

Grunfeld

grappagreen said:

Thanks for this.
Is there a recognised body/association for hypnotherapists? Just want to know the best place to start.

No, it's an unlicenced profession with no protected title, there are about a million organisations and they're all just companies adding a sense of authenticity but in reality it's not enforced very strictly.  (Not compared to what I have to do to keep my State registration as a physiotherapist.)

For what it's worth, I'm signed up with the National Council for Hypnotherapy and its members have all got a diploma for which there's a half-way decent training and there's a good code of ethics. 

Ironically I'm a member of the British Society of Clinical & Academic Hypnosis which is mainly doctors, and also dentists and clinical psychologists, and the odd physio like me, but BSCAH don't like you putting that in your advertising blurb so I don't.

And I did my MSc in experimental psychology researching hypnosis.

However, the most important thing is to see if the clinician has got experience in dealing with performance anxiety.

The blurb I deleted was just a long story about how I got a load of word-of-mouth work from people wanting to be taxi drivers (black cab) and they'd be learning The Knowledge but their minds would freak out when faced with the regular examinations as they made their Appearances.  They'd be just like you:  they knew how to do it, but they'd freeze in front of the examiner.  I helped them through that bit so they could perform to their best ability.  The advantage of experience is that not every subject has the same level of hypnotisability but there's a whole bunch of stuff from regular psychology which helps. 

thebreeze

I have a similar problem.  My fingers just shut down and sometimes I can't do anything that I can normally do.  It's a physical manifestation of "something".  By that, I mean I know exactly what I'm supposed to do - it's not a lack of practise or technique (although I'm waaaay out of your league in those departments), but I just physically can't do it while performing, whereas I can at home or in rehearsals.

A lot of the focus here in the thread is about doing lots of things you don't want to do or don't need to do - I'm not knocking it for some people but I'm just thinking about it.  Perhaps it's the opposite?  Just saying "No - I don't want to" - i.e. when your friends come round, or go to lessons (again), or practise (more and more) or play live in certain ways.  I like the whole thing about playing live too but am I really doing what I want to and playing how I really want to?  Nearly always not - usually it's fitting in with what's required by the band or the song or the audience and the whole thing is in fact an enormous compromise.  And quite rightly because that's often or usually what music and playing in a band is about.  Or is it?  I wonder if it would be different if I could play in a band that functioned exactly how I wanted it to and had exactly the kind and number of musicians that I wanted (say in the fantasy in my head).

I think when we're young and starting out we're doing it because we really want to.  It's the passion.  Often we can't play technique-wise but it doesn't really matter, its fun and it's meaningful.  Later in life some of us are up on stage and speaking for myself, at some level, I'm struggling to work out why I'm there? (fun though it is/could be).

Just putting down thoughts, I don't think I've got the answer unfortunately.  It's certainly very helpful to think about it with you all.

hollywoodrox

grappagreen said:

Changed that.

You may wanna look at these if you're looking for something musical;

Luke type thang;

https://youtu.be/aKjU3fiVdvo

Rock Improvisation

https://youtu.be/OXyYEY6I1Vk

Ballady type thang;

https://youtu.be/9nsW4nex2RQ

Few Jazzy Bars;

https://youtu.be/liELgfdS_6Y

Love that ‘Luke type thing’ and improvised video. Lovely playing and melody’s 

grappagreen

@hollywoodrox ;

That's very kind - thanks...

deano

I went through this phase in my early twenties after playing in bands for about 8 years or so (I'm mid-fifties now so you can do the maths). I needed to take about six months off playing due to a medical condition in my right arm and when I restarted it was frightening. I didn't know if I could and because of that I couldn't if you see what I mean.

My solution, which is not going to be helpful in any way, was alcohol and other less appropriate medication.

I started drinking and about 15 years ago ended up in AA because of it. I could play and play well, and the performance anxiety left me.

I haven't played for getting on for twenty years now and am still of and on again with the booze, but I'm scared to try again now I have the time in case I descend into the hell it became.

As I say, not helpful, except for you to hopefully realise this is not unusual for many reasons, and that you have many people rooting for you (including me!).

Hope it all works out.

Roysterdoyster

I haven’t read every post here, so apologies if this has been covered but my guess (speaking from experience) is that this has got very little to do with a fear of playing the guitar in public. If my experience is anything to go by, it’s something deep seeded (some insecurity) somewhere which you need to sort, and if you can, the rest will flow..ie; get a band, rehearse in front of others,, perform. Our inner critic can run amok sometimes which can be crippling. So if you can sort the root by just talking to someone (anyone really bit a professional will be the way to go) it’s amazing what can follow. I’m doing things now with my band that frankly wouldn’t have been possible a year ago. Go for it. Good luck. 

maw4neu

Fortunately, for me that is, I'm a shit player 100% of the time . . . It took a good while to get consistently shit and it wasn't without hard work and dedication. I'm 57 now and when I played with a band in my late 20's my nickname was " Arthur " as my band-mates would often remark that I was usually HALF a bar behind . . . I'm not proud of this by the way but I've come to live with it. My only saving grace is that I taught my nephew the basics when he was 11 or 12 years old and now he plays like I wish I could :-)