Lettuce crisis

Sporky

Fretwired said:

Something chilled and flown around the world will have zero nutritional value

Dude, it's lettuce.

The salad days of your youth are over

Bridgehouse

Sporky said:

Fretwired said:

Something chilled and flown around the world will have zero nutritional value

Dude, it's lettuce.

The salad days of your youth are over

Talking of flying round the world, shame Mrs May's visit wasn't this week - we could have all sung:

"When you go, will you send back a lettuce from America"

Fuengi

No hope for Romaine?

HAL9000

How come not being able to buy lettuce is a crisis? It's not like it's a beer or whisky shortage is it?

The number of lettuces I buy over the winter period can probably be counted on the fingers of Dave Allen's left hand.

PolarityMan

The biggest thing that could be done is to build retirement lettuces for older people who are effectively 'squatting' in lettuces that are too big for them. My mum would love to get out of her lettuce but can't find anything to downsize into - she lives near me and there are 'old folks salads' which are very popular. You have to be over 55 to buy one - if more of these were grown you'd suddenly find more family lettuces on the market as people like my mum downsized into a smaller cabbage designed for the older person which they can manage. There would then be a lot of family lettuces available which would energise the vegetable market.

We also have some 'crash pad' allotments which sold out the minute they were launched. They are designed for the busy millennial who just wants somewhere to 'crash' due to their busy lifestyle. Basically it's three leaf cauliflour - one large aubergine, a broccoli and an open area with a swede/turnip and carrot. Great way to get on the salad ladder and the farmers grew them up on a disused factory site within a two minute walk of the main railway station with links to Kings Cross. When the come on the market they sell very quickly.

Grunfeld

HAL9000 said:

How come not being able to buy lettuce is a crisis? It's not like it's a beer or whisky shortage is it?

The number of lettuces I buy over the winter period can probably be counted on the fingers of Dave Allen's left hand.

I am guessing you are a man without guinea pigs!

Skipped

I will admit, I am a bit annoyed that there are no courgettes. But I should not be.
We have to learn to love what is available.
Stephen Stills told me that...

HAL9000

Grunfeld said:

HAL9000 said:

How come not being able to buy lettuce is a crisis? It's not like it's a beer or whisky shortage is it?

The number of lettuces I buy over the winter period can probably be counted on the fingers of Dave Allen's left hand.

I am guessing you are a man without guinea pigs!

To paraphrase Marie Antoinette, 'Let them eat isalata di radicchio rossi'.

RandallFlagg

I'm going into Tesco tomorrow armed with a cocked banana and taking the lettuces hostage. Look out for me on News at Ten

Bridgehouse

RandallFlagg said:

I'm going into Tesco tomorrow armed with a cocked banana and taking the lettuces hostage. Look out for me on News at Ten

You'll have more luck with a loaded aubergine I reckon.

RandallFlagg

Grunfeld said:

HAL9000 said:

How come not being able to buy lettuce is a crisis? It's not like it's a beer or whisky shortage is it?

The number of lettuces I buy over the winter period can probably be counted on the fingers of Dave Allen's left hand.

I am guessing you are a man without guinea pigs!

You shouldn't feed guinea pigs lettuce, it's and anaesthetic for them, it's like that stuff Conrad Murray was pumping into Michael Jackson  

Bridgehouse

RandallFlagg said:

Grunfeld said:

HAL9000 said:

How come not being able to buy lettuce is a crisis? It's not like it's a beer or whisky shortage is it?

The number of lettuces I buy over the winter period can probably be counted on the fingers of Dave Allen's left hand.

I am guessing you are a man without guinea pigs!

You shouldn't feed guinea pigs lettuce, it's and anaesthetic for them, it's like that stuff Conrad Murray was pumping into Michael Jackson  

That will explain why my guinea pig is blowing bubbles

RandallFlagg

When we leave the EU bloody Spaniards won't sell us lettuces anyway, we'll have to all get allotments and grow stuff in the public parks like in WWII 

HAL9000

No vegetables in your local Tesco? Then do your shopping in Scotland where there's still plenty of veg on the shelves  ;-) 

thermionic

Bridgehouse said:

Seriously, this crisis is exactly why I voted Romaine rather than leaf

Thread won. Well played sir.

Serious point though - Tesco and some other supermarket have imposed a restriction of a maximum of three lettuce per customer. Whenever I buy one half of it ends up in the bin before I can use it. Who needs three? People who own 20 rabbits?

Bridgehouse

thermionic said:

Bridgehouse said:

Seriously, this crisis is exactly why I voted Romaine rather than leaf

Thread won. Well played sir.

Serious point though - Tesco and some other supermarket have imposed a restriction of a maximum of three lettuce per customer. Whenever I buy one half of it ends up in the bin before I can use it. Who needs three? People who own 20 rabbits?

I did read about that - and yes, 3 does seem a ridiculous amount to purchase in one go.. 

Puns aside, this is weather related. It happens from time to time. Why the media is making so much of it is beyond me..

FreddieVanHalen

Worst attempt at getting people to panic buy healthy foods ever

Sporky

thermionic said:

Who needs three? People who own 20 rabbits?

I had seven rabbits at one point. None of them ate lettuce - it's bad for them.

Most of them liked broccoli though.

Fortheloveofguitar

Lettuce pray that this shortage is resolved quickly 

RocknRollDave

Just eat chips instead. I do.